Memories of You
by MeeLee
Summary: [COMPLETE] AU. Kakashi never believed in Angels, or Heaven and Hell. Then cheerful but eccentric Umino Iruka showed up, and now Kakashi doesn't know what to believe anymore. KakaIru, yaoi.
1. I

**A/N: **This actually didn't begin as an entry for 55Themes; it was a separate story, a practice story for a longer angel fic that would feature GenHaya as the primary pairing. (I have yet to start planning that one, BTW. The plot has been cleverly evading me for the last year or so…) But some of the themes seemed to fit with it, so I assigned them. Because I'm all-powerful like that.

In case you couldn't tell from the summary, this is an AU, KakaIru fanfic. This means it does not take place in the Narutoverse, and rather more in our own modern world.

The introductory chapter, as almost by a rule, isn't all that interesting. But please bear with me; it gets better later, I promise.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto.

* * *

**Themes: **#4 – Church; #32 – Reincarnation; #41 – Forsaken; #55 – Suicide.

* * *

Memories of You

**BEGIN**

White. So much white. Like a field of snow, except it was not snow. Just…white.

And warmth. Sunlight, endless endless sunlight. The warmth, and the happiness.

The white begins to break. Wisps of cotton…no, feathers. One, two, three, three hundred, infinity forever. All feathers. All falling.

Why are they falling?

_Why am I bleeding?_

Grey. Grey, and cold. And blood. Why so much blood? I didn't do anything wrong, did I? Why is this happening?

Why—_drip, drip._ Why?

The light—the light is gone. Disappeared. Sun is gone, warmth is gone, even—even not-snow is gone. Only the _dripdripdrip._

Red. Light is gone, sun is gone warmth isgone everythingisgone—

_I am gone._

And then—

Black.

* * *

"Excuse me?"

Hatake Kakashi looked up, blinking at the young teenager currently standing across the smooth counter. He could not have been more than fourteen. "Yes?"

The boy smiled, bringing up a familiar, bright orange book and placing it on the counter. "You don't have a price for this," he said. "Could you tell me how much?"

Kakashi set a hand on the book before leaning over the counter to stare the boy straight in the eyes. "How old are you, kid?"

The boy blanched. "Tw-Twenty-one, can't you tell?"

Kakashi tilted his head. "No, I can't," he said with a bored look. "Got proof? ID or something, for example?"

"I'm mature enough to read something like this!" the boy protested.

"Maybe you are," Kakashi said with a shrug, "but that doesn't really matter. See this?" He pointed to a large sign propped up on the counter beside him. "It says _Icha Icha_ cannot be sold to minors. You're a minor. Therefore, according to this sign, I can't sell to you. Simple as that."

"But mister—"

"No means no, kid," Kakashi said. "Now it's almost nine o'clock, and I'm closing up. Better get on out of here before your parents find out what you're doing."

The boy puffed out his bottom lip in a perfect child-like pout. "Fine!" he said, "I'll just go buy it somewhere else!" And he turned, stalking out of the store.

Kakashi grinned. "You can try," he called after the retreating teen, "But I'm the only storeowner in this city who sells this series. Happy hunting!" The boy mumbled something about "senile old bastards" as he walked out the door.

Kakashi chuckled, picking up the _Icha Icha_ volume and walking into the adult aisle, sliding the book carefully onto the shelf between its other bright orange companions. Shaking his head, he decided then and there to have the entire series locked up in a glass case, because if one of those minors managed to sneak off with one of them…he would be in serious trouble.

Walking back over to the counter, Kakashi rang up the cash register and began counting the day's earnings, carefully recording them in his accounting notebook. Jiraiya, the old owner and the author of _Icha Icha_ who had retired four years ago, had expressly advised him to keep good records, because money was easily lost.

Apparently memories were too, Kakashi mused as he began calculating the totals. Jiraiya had laughed at that, but Kakashi hadn't expected him to understand. After all, who would believe that someone had randomly turned up on the streets eight years ago, alone and with no memory whatsoever?

Kakashi wouldn't have believed it either, if the someone in question hadn't been him.

Finishing up with his calculations, he carefully put the book away before tucking all his personal things into his bag. Walking up to the front of the store, he flipped the sign at the front from OPEN to CLOSED, locked up the store, and started on the walk home.

Sighing, Kakashi tilted his head back, locking his fingers behind his head as he peered up at the bright white sliver of moon in the dark sky above. He had come a long way in these last eight years since he had first appeared on the steps of the local church, alone and cold with only a thin set of dark robes to cover him. He had no idea why he was here, or where he had been before. His memories before that time were a blank.

The first couple of months had been spent in a homeless shelter, grubbing for food, water and clothing with the other outcasts of society. Then he was given a job cleaning houses and stores, and was able to move into a measly, one-room apartment just shy of the slums on his meager income.

A year into the job, Jiraiya hired him to sweep down his bookstore one morning. Intrigued by the young man's polite company and quiet dedication, Jiraiya hired him again, and again, and again, until Kakashi eventually became a regular store employee, helping Jiraiya stock shelves, keep accounts, and manage the cash register. A year later, Jiraiya allowed Kakashi to move into his apartment, a spacious two-bedroom plot, and two years after that the old man retired, moving into a house several counties away and leaving both the store and the apartment to Kakashi.

Things had sort of just gone their own pace after that, Kakashi thought to himself as he walked slowly up the steps to the front of his apartment, unlocking the door, shedding his shoes, and stepping inside. Tossing his bag carelessly onto a nearby chair, he made his way into the kitchen to make tea, carrying the steaming hot mug into his bedroom. Setting the mug onto the corner of the desk, he groped for a pen with one hand while reaching into the bottom-most drawer for his journal with the other.

Staring at the worn leather binding of the book, Kakashi sighed. His psychologist had told him that keeping a journal might help him get a better grip on his lost memories, but in these last three or so years of writing, he had not made any progress.

Blinking, Kakashi reached back into the drawer, digging around until he was finally able to locate the first journal he had ever gotten. It was bright red, decorated with little hearts, and Kakashi rolled his eyes. His psychologist had given it to him—his psychologist, a young blonde woman who had spent half their session time flirting with him. It had felt wrong—strangely painful to receive such attention, so Kakashi had told her he was taken during their second session. By a man.

Flipping open the book, Kakashi went to the first entry. His psychologist had told him that he needed to wipe the slate clean on this first entry; he had to go past all the memories that had built up these past few years, and focus only on the ones he had had when he had first shown up on the church steps. After trying for several long minutes, Kakashi had only been able to come up with two facts that he clearly remembered.

Bringing the desk lamp over to shed more light on the worn pages, Kakashi carefully read the short entry.

"My name is Hatake Kakashi. I am 26 years old, I think. Could be younger, but I'll just go with that.

"On Oct. 14, I woke up on the steps of the local church. Don't remember a thing before that. Maybe I got drunk and passed out? But that's stupid. It wouldn't have wiped all my memories out. Plus I don't drink.

"I was dressed in these thin, dark gray robes. They feel sort of like silk, except softer. They're in a box in my closet right now. Thank goodness I didn't appear naked; that would've been embarrassing. Though Imada-san would've had a nosebleed if that had happened…

"I don't know what else to write about. Wish I knew what had happened before all this. There's so much speculation I can do: maybe I'm a subject of a secret government human experiment and I escaped from the lab. Or maybe I'm the long-lost son of a super-rich family, which means that they're looking for me. Or maybe…

"This is stupid. I'll write more tomorrow."

Kakashi chuckled at that, shaking his head as he closed the journal. He didn't blame himself for speculating. Not being able to remember anything was frustrating.

Going back to his current journal, he wrote a quick, rather boring entry of the day's events before tossing both books back into the drawer and kicking it closed. An hour later, after dinner and a shower and everything else, he was in bed, asleep.


	2. II

**A/N: **We now introduce the supernatural element into this story. Hurray for Iruka.

Sorry for the boring intro last chapter. The plot picks up from here on out.

**_MEMORIES OF YOU:_ CHAPTER II**

The sky was beginning to lighten when he finally came down onto the sidewalk, his chains making an eerie _shikk_ sound as they dragged across the cement. In one hand he held a single large white feather, pulsing gently in time with every step he took.

Three days. It had taken him three days to locate him. But it couldn't be helped; he was not as strong as the others, not as sensitive, not as efficient. He had been lucky to find the location at all.

Still walking, he watched passively as the feather began to pulse faster as he approached the towering apartment complex. Looking up, he blinked at a door on the second floor, walking slowly up the wooden steps, still dragging his chains. Upon reaching the closed door, he pressed the feather firmly against the wood, watching as its pulsing stopped and its glow expanded to an almost blinding white light.

So he really was here.

He smiled, a smile of sadness, regret, but also of hope. He was here. He was really here. After eight long years…he had finally found him again.

Retreating into the shadows at the base of the stairs, he sank down onto the cold grass, pulling his thin robes more tightly about his body, and waited patiently for the dawn.

* * *

Hatake Kakashi awoke early the next morning as usual. Blinking the sleep from his eyes, he threw the covers back and sprang lithely out of bed, heading immediately for the shower, already thinking about what he would have for breakfast. He was out the door by eight o'clock, humming cheerfully to himself as he descended the stairs and headed down the sidewalk toward his store.

He didn't notice the dark figure that quickly detached itself from the nearby shadows and fell in step behind him.

Jogging up to the front door of the store, Kakashi unlocked it, flipping the sign over on his way to the counter. Tossing his bag onto a nearby chair, he flicked on the store lights and then bent down, plugging in the cash register. Straightening again, he looked up—and nearly screamed.

"The hell!" He stumbled back but managed to catch himself on the chair, staring in shock at the young man currently standing across the counter from him. He had long, dark brown hair currently pulled into a tight ponytail, and was dressed in a neat, dark blue long-sleeve shirt and a pair of jeans. His skin was a light bronze, and a long dark scar ran horizontally across his nose.

The man smiled, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "Sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to scare you. It's just that your light was on and…well, I'm really sorry."

By now Kakashi had gotten enough of his bearings back to breathe normally again as he straightened, toeing the chair a little closer to him. "It's all right," he said. "I just didn't hear you open the door, is all." That was weird, too, because he always kept a bell on the door handle to alert him whenever a customer came or went.

The young man cleared his throat. "Um, so," he said, still smiling nervously as he made a polite bow, "I'm Umino Iruka."

Kakashi nodded, extending a hand. "Hatake Kakashi. Pleased to meet you."

To his surprise, Iruka didn't take the offered hand. Instead, he sent said hand an uncertain, nervous look before scratching at the scar across his nose, still smiling. "Yes, same here," he said, ignoring the hand, "I, uh, I don't really…well, this…" He spared another glance at the hand before seeming to shake himself and saying in a firmer voice, "I'm a new teacher at the elementary school here, and I'm looking for some books for my class."

Kakashi blinked, lowering his hand slowly before nodding. "Educational materials are over there," he said, pointing.

"Ah." Iruka nodded, smiling. "Thank you." Turning, he headed in the direction of the bookshelves and began to browse.

An hour later, he was still browsing. Kakashi had assisted two customers and made three transactions, but Iruka was still there, staring quietly at the shelf. Handing the plastic bag to another customer and thanking him, Kakashi turned to catch Iruka staring at him for perhaps the fifth time since he had entered. The young teacher instantly blushed, sending him a small smile before turning back to the bookshelf.

Cocking an eyebrow, Kakashi slowly rose, walking around the counter and approaching the young man. "Need help?"

Iruka jumped, shuffling quickly back several steps. "Ah…" He grabbed the nearest book from the shelf and shook his head. "No, this one'll be perfect, thanks…"

Kakashi tilted his head. "_Advanced Calculus_? That's hardly something you teach elementary school children."

"Eh-heh." Iruka laughed nervously, and Kakashi briefly considered getting medical help before he passed out from all the blood rushing to his face. "I…didn't notice. Could you make a recommendation?"

"Well." Kakashi bent over, searching the bottom-most shelf before finally pulling out a thin workbook. "_Basic Arithmetic_. Should be suitable."

Iruka nodded, replacing the calculus textbook while taking the offered workbook. "Thank you. How much?"

"Come on over to the cash register and I'll tell you," Kakashi said, beckoning. Iruka followed him over to the counter.

_Shikk. Shikk._

Kakashi stopped, turning. "Did you hear that?"

Iruka blinked. "Hear what?"

"This…scratching sound. Metallic, maybe."

Iruka shrugged. "Plumbing, maybe? Or the lights?"

"No, I've never heard that sound before." Kakashi frowned, then shrugged. "Well, forget it for now. Come on, I'll check the price for you."

Iruka nodded, handing the book over.

_Shikk._

Kakashi frowned. "There it is again. Don't you hear it?"

Iruka shook his head. "I'm sorry, Ka—Hatake-san, I don't hear anything."

Kakashi rose. "There's something making that sound," he said, "And I'm going to—"

"Ah, no," Iruka said, speaking quickly, "There's no need, I mean, there isn't anything—uh, why don't we go for coffee or something?"

That stopped Kakashi, and he gave Iruka an odd look. "Coffee?"

Iruka nodded before indicating the door. "There's a small café just down the street. Perhaps you've seen it?"

"Yes, I've seen it," Kakashi said. "But we've only just met. Why would I go out for coffee with you?"

"Oh." A sudden sad look came over Iruka's face. "Well, I just thought that…I mean, I…"

The disappointment in his eyes made Kakashi's heart clench for some unknown reason, and he was speaking before he was even fully aware of it. "Ah—well, it couldn't hurt, I guess. Just…not now, okay? I mean, I've got to run my store, and you…well, haven't you got class? Shouldn't your students be in school by now?"

"Ah—yes, of course," Iruka said, brightening, bowing as he placed some money on the counter and took the workbook. "Yes, well, I'll see you later today then, Hatake-san, thank you!" And he turned, taking broad strides toward the door.

Kakashi blinked before suddenly remembering something. "Oi, Umino-san!" he called out, "I didn't tell you the price yet—" But Iruka had already gone out the door, the bell tinkling merrily as it closed behind him.

Kakashi stared for a moment before turning to scoop up the money on the counter. "Geez, he probably gave me too much," he muttered to himself as he began to count. A few seconds later, he was blinking in disbelief at the wad of bills and coins resting on his palm. Iruka had given him the exact amount for the book, including tax, down to the very last cent.

Tucking the money into the appropriate slots on the cash register, Kakashi slowly shook his head. This Umino Iruka was certainly proving to be an interesting character.


	3. III

**A/N: **Well, finals have descended upon me, so I figured I'd update this now else you guys wouldn't get anything until probably after Christmas.

Heaven help me. I'm going to die.

Merry Early Christmas and Happy Early New Year in case I don't get back to this before that time.

**_MEMORIES OF YOU:_ CHAPTER III**

The rest of the day passed rather uneventfully, and between transactions Kakashi spent some time trying to locate the origin of that strange scratching sound. Unfortunately, it had stopped after Iruka left, and no matter how many drawers he opened or how many shelves he looked behind, he could find nothing out of the ordinary.

Evening came in a rush of cold and darkness that Kakashi did not feel, snugly wrapped in the cozy warmth of his bookstore. When the clock finally struck nine, he gave a sigh of frustration at not having found the origin of the scratching sound, throwing a couple of books into a cardboard box for sorting later. Bending down, he pushed the box under the counter, straightened—and nearly had a heart attack for the second time when he saw Iruka standing across the counter from him, in the exact same position as he had been in the morning.

It was lucky for Kakashi that he had had one hand on the counter at the time, or he might have slipped from shock and brained himself on the edge of the metal. As it were, he jumped and slammed both hands onto the counter to keep himself from falling as he glared at Iruka. "Would you stop doing that?"

The teacher blinked innocently. "Doing what?"

"Appearing—Just randomly appearing like that!" Kakashi said, waving a hand around as if to prove his point. "How do you manage to sneak up on me so easily anyway?"

"Oh." Iruka grinned, blushing slightly. "Well, I'm just sort of getting back into it, that's all."

Kakashi blinked. "Getting back into what?"

"Oh, well," Iruka said, looking slightly confused, "The doors and stuff—I mean, it's been so long since I've had to, well, _use_—uh, I mean, want to go for coffee now?"

Kakashi thought he was changing the subject and told him so.

Iruka just shrugged. "I've just never had any prior experience with this, that's all," he said. "So, coffee?" He made a halfhearted gesture toward the door.

Kakashi scratched his head, quietly wondering why he was going along with this. "Sure," he said. "Just let me close up the store."

He did so, and within ten minutes they were seated at a small table at the corner of the café. Kakashi ordered black coffee, but to his surprise Iruka ordered only water and, when their drinks were served, he seemed to have no intention of drinking it. Kakashi opened his mouth to ask about it but Iruka interrupted him.

"So," the brunet said, smiling amiably, "How have you been lately?"

Kakashi took a sip of the coffee, sighing quietly as he felt the hot liquid run slowly down his throat. "Define 'lately.'"

"Well," Iruka said, "Let's say…the last several years or so."

Kakashi blinked before answering. "Fine, I suppose," he said. "I've been working my way up the social ladder these last few years. Been doing okay, I hope."

The teacher nodded. "Where were you before?"

Kakashi hesitated; he usually didn't talk much about his amnesiac state, especially since people tended to laugh. But looking into Iruka's soft brown eyes, he felt that he could trust the man, so he spoke. "You're probably not going to believe me," he said, staring down at the pool of black in his mug as he spoke, "But I lost my memory eight years ago."

"Is that so?" Iruka gave no indication of being surprised.

Kakashi nodded. "Woke up on the steps of the church here, couldn't remember a thing other than my name and my age. I've been trying to figure out what happened before I appeared here, but so far I haven't had any luck."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Hatake-san."

The soft tone of Iruka's voice made Kakashi look up, thinking that the teacher was only humoring him. When he saw the sincere smile on Iruka's face, however, he decided that wasn't the case and instead changed what he had been about to say. "Just call me Kakashi," he said.

Iruka nodded, cheeks flushing a light pink as he answered, "Then you can call me Iruka, I suppose. You don't have to if you don't want to, of course, I really don't care—"

"That's fine, Iruka," Kakashi interrupted, before cocking his head. "Has anyone ever told you that you're a little…odd?"

"Eh?" Iruka laughed. "Ah, that…well, I've just never done this before, that's all."

Kakashi blinked. "Done what before?"

"Ah…" Iruka seemed at a loss for words before suddenly brightening. "Oh, check!"

Kakashi cocked an eyebrow as their check arrived before reaching toward it. "I'll pay."

"Oh no," Iruka quickly said, reaching out for the check as well, "There's no need—" Their hands brushed and he instantly jerked his hand back, rubbing it with his other hand. "Ah, okay, you pay."

Kakashi blinked as he saw a flash of dark red. "Hey, Iruka, is your hand burned or something?"

"Hm?" Iruka brought the hand up to the light, revealing uniform tan skin. "No, I don't see anything."

Kakashi frowned as he dropped some bills onto the check and handed it to the waiter. "Must've been a trick of the light then."

"Ah." Iruka nodded as he rose. "Shall we then?"

"Sure," Kakashi said, rising also, and together they walked out the door.

Once they were outside, however, Iruka turned to him with a sheepish smile. "Uh, could I ask you for a big favor, Kakashi?" he asked.

Kakashi turned. "Hm?"

"Well, you see…" Iruka chuckled nervously. "I don't really have a place to stay. I mean, my boss hasn't given me accommodations yet, so I don't quite have anywhere to go at the moment…"

The silver-haired man blinked in disbelief. "You mean you're sleeping out on the streets?"

"Well, it's not exactly sleeping," Iruka answered quickly, "But, um…yeah, I guess." He paused. "I…don't suppose you'd let me stay with you?"

Half of Kakashi's brain instantly objected to the idea, telling him that inviting a stranger into your home was just begging for something bad to happen. The other half, however, asked him how he would feel if he found Iruka had been run over by a car during the night or something. Besides, the teacher seemed nice, albeit a bit strange, and Kakashi had the unexplainable feeling that he could trust him with his life. So what real harm could come of it?

Kakashi decided to listen to the second half of his brain that night. "All right, follow me," he said, beckoning. Iruka grinned and tailed him down the sidewalk.

They arrived at his apartment within minutes, and Kakashi allowed Iruka to precede him inside. Walking into the kitchen, the young teacher turned once, surveying the place, and Kakashi suddenly felt a little self-conscious of the rather sloppy condition of the apartment. "I wasn't exactly expecting guests," he attempted.

"Oh, no," Iruka said, "I don't mind at all. It's very…homey."

_Shikk. Shikk._

Kakashi blinked. "There, you must've heard that."

The young teacher only shook his head. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about," he said.

"That scratching sound," Kakashi said, stepping forward, eyes searching the apartment. "It went away in the morning, but now it's back."

Iruka shrugged. _Shikk._ "Maybe it's something outside?"

Kakashi shook his head. "No, I can hear…are you sure there isn't anything?"

"Not that I know of."

Kakashi sighed. "Must be my imagination then." He paused. "Well, how about I order us some dinner? Or would you like tea?"

At this, Iruka smiled. "There's no need to worry yourself on my account," he said, "I can take care of myself, and I promise I won't be a burden to you. You can forget I'm ali—here, if you want to."

"Ah." Kakashi shrugged. "Well, if you insist." He pointed toward one of the rooms down the hall. "I have an extra bedroom," he said, "So you can use it for the time being, if you want."

Iruka nodded. "Thank you."

He didn't move. Neither did Kakashi. They stood there, just inside the doorway, an awkward silence hanging between them for at least a minute before Iruka finally spoke. "May I ask you a candid question, Kakashi?"

Kakashi straightened, all too grateful for the distraction. "Depends on what it is."

Iruka smiled, though it was uncertain. "Are you a religious man?"

Kakashi blinked; of all the questions Iruka could have asked him, that was the last one he had expected. "Um…no, not particularly."

Iruka nodded, his face taking on a more serious expression. "Do you believe in Angels then?"

"No."

A pause. "What about Heaven and Hell?"

"I'll find out when I find out, I suppose," Kakashi answered, before looking up. "Why are you asking me this?"

"Oh." Iruka had a strangely sad expression on his face at the moment. "Just…curious. I'll go to bed now; good night." And before Kakashi could say anything, he had disappeared down the hallway and into the second bedroom, quietly closing the door behind him.

Kakashi blinked in confusion at him before finally deciding to drop the matter, turning instead toward the kitchen to make dinner.

Several hours later, when the apartment was dark and all was quiet, the door to Iruka's room slowly opened without a sound and a dark figure slipped out. Iruka slowly made his way over to Kakashi's open bedroom door, stepping across the threshold and taking a moment to simply observe the lump under the covers that was Kakashi, sound asleep.

He stayed like that, staring, for a long moment before the screech of some night bird seemed to rouse him from his reverie and, glancing briefly over at the clock on the nearby nightstand, he quietly approached Kakashi's bed, chains dragging softly behind him. _Shikk. Shikk. Shikk._

An eternity passed before he finally found himself kneeling by Kakashi's bed, quietly watching the moonlight play across the sleeping man's face. He was exactly the way that Iruka remembered him; he had not aged a day in these last eight years, and Iruka allowed himself a shaky smile as he slowly reached forward, fingertips barely brushing the topmost strands of Kakashi's silver hair. There was a light tingling sensation upon contact that eventually became a sharp burning as he gently stroked Kakashi's hair, but Iruka ignored it. This pain was a small price to pay for the opportunity to be this close to Kakashi again. Even though Kakashi didn't remember him.

_Shikk._ His chains rattled slightly as his hand began to shake. _Shikk. Shikk._

The tears came next, but Iruka had the sense to withdraw his hand and retreat across the room before the water could hit Kakashi's face. He stood there for a moment, trembling, cheeks glistening in the moonlight as he watched Kakashi. Finally, though, he spoke, whispered words that were lost in the darkness of the room.

"Please forgive me, Kakashi. You weren't meant to pay for my mistake."


	4. IV

**A/N: **Well, it's almost time for me to go back to school. With that said, then, on to the fourth chapter. It's a bit boring, I'm afraid, but bear with me. The fic'll wrap itself up in a few more chapters anyway.

Hope you all had/are having a good holiday.

EDIT: I gave it some consideration and decided it would be better to cut off this chapter at a different place, so I reuploaded it. Hopefully not too many people have read the first update yet…

**_MEMORIES OF YOU:_ CHAPTER IV**

Hatake Kakashi awoke to the smell of warm food wafting in from the kitchen and, slowly pushing himself up to a sitting position on the bed, he sniffed tentatively at the air.

Pancakes?

"Iruka?"

"Morning!" came the cheerful answering voice. "One second—they're almost done!"

Springing out of bed and dressing, Kakashi made his way quickly down the hall and into the kitchen. "I didn't know you could cook."

"Me neither," Iruka said, grinning as he turned off the burner and slid the pancakes onto a plate. "You're just in time. Hope you like 'em with blueberries." He set the plate down onto the table and went to grab the butter and syrup. _Shikk. Shikk._ Kakashi ignored it.

He blinked as he slowly took a seat. "Aren't you going to eat anything?"

"I already did," Iruka said. "Like I said, there's no need to worry about me, right?"

Kakashi shrugged and dug in. A half-hour later, he grabbed his bag and headed for the door, but turned upon opening it. "Hey…"

Iruka, who was seated on the couch, flipping through the morning newspaper, looked up. "Hm?"

"Don't you have class?"

Iruka shrugged. "Starts later," he said. "Don't worry, I'll be sure to lock the door and everything on my way out."

"Ah." The half of Kakashi's brain that had told him the previous night that taking Iruka in was a bad idea now decided to warn him that leaving a stranger alone in his house would probably end up with a burglary report. But, as with last night, Kakashi squashed it. "Okay. See you later."

"Bye." And he walked out.

As soon as the door closed behind him, however, Iruka tossed the newspaper aside and rose, heading immediately for Kakashi's bedroom. Once there, he went straight to the desk, opened the bottom-most drawer, and pulled out the bright red journal, flipping it open. Taking a seat at the desk, he began to read.

"My name is Hatake Kakashi. I am 26 years old, I think…"

* * *

When nine o'clock rolled around, Kakashi had unconsciously steeled himself enough so that he didn't yell when Iruka suddenly appeared across the counter again. Instead, he opted for a sort of surprised half-hop as he regarded the teacher strangely.

Iruka raised a hand in greeting and smiled. "Evening."

Kakashi shook his head. "You have got to teach me how you do that."

"Do what?"

He waved toward the door. "Get inside the store without making a sound. The bell's on the door for a reason, you know."

"Oh." Iruka shrugged before grinning. "Magic."

Kakashi cocked an eyebrow. "Magic…?"

Iruka just laughed. "Come on," he said, "I'll cook dinner when we get home."

They arrived at Kakashi's apartment within minutes, and as promised Iruka cooked up a storm. Again Kakashi was surprised that Iruka didn't eat, but the teacher assured him that he had already eaten at school. He decided not to push it.

They lounged around after dinner, Kakashi scribbling some thoughts in his journal and Iruka simply seated on the edge of the couch, looking quietly out the window. Presently, though, he spoke. "Ne, Kakashi…"

Kakashi finished the sentence before turning. "Hm?"

When Iruka continued, his voice held a dreamy, far-off quality. "Do you believe in Angels?"

Kakashi frowned. "No, I don't," he said, "And haven't we covered this already?"

The bluntness of his words seemed to rouse Iruka out of his trance-like state because he straightened, blinking once at Kakashi before smiling. "Ah, sorry, I forgot," he said before springing off the couch. "Well, I'm off to bed, good night!" And he disappeared into his room before Kakashi could say a word.

Scratching his head, Kakashi went back to his journal entry.

"Iruka has got to be the strangest person I've met since Jiraiya, and that's saying a lot. He seems like a nice person; he always smiles, his cooking is great, and his blushes are rather cute—" Here he stopped, blinking down at the word he had just written. Very slowly, he lifted his head and glanced in the direction of Iruka's closed door before flushing and scribbling out the word, replacing it with "amusing."

He paused for a moment, thinking, before continuing on. "I find it easy to trust him. I know it's wrong to trust a stranger so quickly, but I do. I hardly met him two days ago, but I already feel like I've known him for years. He makes me feel—" He stopped to think. "—safe. Maybe that's why he teaches small children.

"On to other things then. Still haven't found out where that weird scratching sound is coming from. I think it only comes up when Iruka's around, but he doesn't hear anything, so either he really doesn't know, or he's lying. He'd better not be lying; that would hurt me. Don't really know why, but if he lied to me—" Here he stopped again, tapping the top of the pen lightly against his bottom lip as he regarded what he had just written. There he was again, spiraling back to Iruka. Why couldn't he stop thinking about him?

_You're probably just lonely, Kakashi. After all, he's the first person who's shown any genuine interest in you these past few years, except for Imada-san, but you can do without _her_ attention. You're just focusing on him because he's the only thing out of the ordinary in your life at the moment._

Shrugging, Kakashi started a new line, not even bothering to end the previous one. "Suppose that's all. Write more tomorrow." Folding the book, he tossed it back into the drawer, toed it shut, and headed to bed.

Seated on the edge of the guest bed, Iruka sighed, bringing a hand up to scratch at the scar across his nose. _Shikk._ He blinked, giving the chain a halfhearted shake before finally just falling backwards, sprawling onto the bed and waiting for the next morning.

* * *

Two days passed in this manner. Iruka was always up before Kakashi, no matter how early the other awakened. He was always there at Kakashi's closing time, and they always walked home together. He always cooked meals but never ate any himself, and he always retreated into his bedroom whenever he was caught off guard.

Other than his strange habits, however, Kakashi found him quite companionable. The young storekeeper was not unobservant though, and he could not help but notice that Iruka had no homework or tests to grade, no lesson plans to make, and indeed didn't seem to have any teacherly duties to take care of at all; he simply disappeared during the day and appeared again at night, and before long Kakashi became curious.

The morning of the third day, he bid farewell to Iruka as usual and headed out the door. As soon as he was on the sidewalk, however, he immediately retreated into a small alley between the buildings, crouching down behind one of the garbage cans and waiting.

Soon enough, the door to his apartment opened and Iruka stepped out, dutifully locking up before descending the stairs. He had a bit of a strained expression on his face that Kakashi noted as he silently tailed the other man down the sidewalk.

Iruka walked rather fast, Kakashi discovered as he quickened his pace to a jog, watching as the figure up ahead grew smaller and smaller. If Iruka didn't get to wherever he was going soon, Kakashi would probably have to sprint to catch up to him—how in the world could someone move so fast—

Then Iruka turned, and Kakashi nearly halted in surprise except he forced himself to move on, keeping pace with the young teacher as his mind reeled with confusion. Iruka had turned away from the elementary school, and was heading toward…

This time Kakashi did stop. He stood there for a moment, staring up at the towering arches, the high steeples, the tall panes of stained glass. They were at the city's local church.

For a brief instant a flash of _alone and cold and darkness and whywhywhy_ flickered through his mind, but he clamped firmly down on it and instead focused on Iruka, who was currently pushing open the heavy wooden door, disappearing inside. After a few moments, Kakashi followed, walking quickly up the wooden steps and drawing the door open just enough to poke his head inside.

The church was empty, and Iruka was already halfway to the altar. Kakashi watched as the young brown-haired man knelt down before the elaborate shrine, bowing until his forehead was nearly touching the floor. "You summoned me?" he asked, voice echoing eerily in the emptiness.

Instantly there came a bright flash of light, and the entire altar seemed to light up. Kakashi watched in utter disbelief as the light expanded into a huge radial glow, and very slowly a human figure began to materialize until he could make out what looked to be a young woman with long black hair and dark red eyes, dressed in all white robes. A pair of large white wings jutted out of her back, enveloping her in a feathery half-cocoon, and her very being seemed to radiate light and power as she looked down at Iruka, who was still kneeling before her.

"You're running out of time, Iruka," the—what? Fairy? Angel? Weird tripped-out hologram?—said, voice echoing of its own accord, soft and melodic.

Iruka nodded slowly, refusing to look up. "I am aware, Kurenai-sama."

Kurenai frowned. "You're stalling."

"My deepest apologies, Kurenai-sama."

"If you don't act soon, the Father will not be pleased."

Iruka bowed down even lower, if that was even possible. "I understand," he said. "I'll do it as soon as possible."

"Very well." Kurenai paused for a moment before smiling sadly. "I'm sorry, but you can't hold on to him forever, Iruka." Her eyes rose then, and locked directly on Kakashi. The storekeeper shifted uncomfortably under that regal red gaze, and would have retreated if Kurenai had not turned back to Iruka. "Part of moving on," she said, "is letting him go."

When Iruka answered, his voice was slightly uncertain. "I know."

Kurenai smiled again. "Good luck, then." And in another flash of white light she was gone.

Kakashi did not see Iruka's response, for he was already out the door, stumbling down the steps as his mind reeled with what he had just seen. He tripped on the edge of the sidewalk and staggered onto the street, barely missing an oncoming car. The resulting blaring honk roused him a bit from his shocked state so that he was able to hop back to safety again, but still his mind could not fully wrap itself around the incredible scene that had just unfolded before his eyes.

Was it possible? Kakashi thought as he made his way slowly down the sidewalk, feet unconsciously turning toward his bookstore. Was that…that _vision_ in the church that morning really an angel? Was Iruka connected to the other world somehow?

Iruka's persistent question suddenly rang out in his head. _Do you believe in Angels?_

Kakashi sighed, groping blindly in his pocket for his store keys and unlocking the door with shaking hands. What about that…Kurenai, was that her name? She had told Iruka that he was stalling for time, and that he was supposed to do something to Kakashi. What was Iruka going to do? Kill him? Curse him? _What?_

_Heaven and Hell? Do you believe in Heaven and Hell?_

_I'll find out when I find out, I suppose…_

Kakashi gritted his teeth. _Shit, I'm going to _die, he thought to himself, before clenching his hands into unconscious fists. Iruka would have a lot of explaining to do that night.


	5. V

**A/N: **I'm sorry about the confusion over Chapter 4. For those of you who read the first post, I went back and added another section and then reposted it. So if you missed the part about Iruka in the church, you might want to go back and read Chapter 4 else much of this chapter won't make sense.

I was originally going to make this the final chapter, but then it would have turned out incredibly long. So I cut it off at a sort of cliffhanger-ish part. Please forgive me?

Next chapter should be the final one. Thanks to all of you who have been reviewing so far. Your support gives me incentive to keep writing.

Enjoy this chapter, and I hope I'll see you again at the final installment of this story.

**_MEMORIES OF YOU:_ CHAPTER V**

Kakashi closed his store early that evening and was home by eight-thirty. The apartment was empty and dark, as expected, but he didn't care. Instead, he walked into his bedroom, took the nine-millimeter handgun from where he always kept it stashed in a small box in his closet, and sat down on the couch in the living room, sliding the pistol carefully underneath one of the pillows. He then sat back and waited.

Sure enough, exactly a minute after nine, there came a knock at the apartment door, followed by a voice, slightly muffled by the thin wooden partition. "Kakashi?"

Kakashi took a deep breath. "The door's unlocked, come on in," he said.

Very slowly the door opened, and Iruka poked his head inside, grinning immediately upon spotting Kakashi lounging on the couch. "You weren't at the store," he said.

Kakashi nodded, careful to keep his facial expression and voice neutral as he answered, "I decided to close early and came back here."

Iruka nodded, stepping fully into the apartment and closing the door. "Have you eaten yet?"

"No," Kakashi said, and slowly slid a hand underneath the pillow, wrapping cold fingers around the handle of the gun. "I was waiting for you."

Iruka blinked, and a light blush tinted his cheeks. "Waiting for me?"

"Yes," Kakashi said, nodding. "I have a few questions I want to ask you."

The young teacher gave him a brief, confused look before smiling. "Okay, shoot. I'll try my best to—"

"What school do you teach at?"

Iruka started; Kakashi could see it clearly. "Ah—uh, the one…the one just down the street, y'know—"

"What's it called?"

The teacher shifted uncomfortably. "Well, you see—"

"What teaching academy did you go to?" Kakashi continued, plowing straight through him as he gained more steam. "What are your credentials? What city did you come from before you moved here? Who's this boss who's supposed to be giving you your 'accomodations?'"

"Ah…" Iruka was flailing, caught completely off-guard; Kakashi could tell. "Y-You see," the teacher said, face betraying worry and surprise and confusion and a million other emotions, "I didn't—I mean, I haven't really, well, you know, it's only been a little—"

He jumped, suddenly finding himself staring down the open end of a sleek black muzzle as Kakashi pointed the pistol at him. His face was cold, hard, emotionless, and Iruka swallowed hard as Kakashi spoke in a slow voice. "You're a liar," he said.

Iruka gave the gun a quick once-over before taking a step forward. "Kakashi, please let me explain—"

"Yes," Kakashi said, keeping the gun aimed straight at Iruka's heart. "Yes, you are going to explain, and you are going to start with what the _hell_ happened in that church this morning."

Iruka blinked. "You…saw that?"

"Of course I saw it," Kakashi said. "Do I look stupid to you, Iruka? You think I wouldn't notice your strange little quirks, or the fact that you have no grading to do, or that you seem to randomly appear and disappear out of nowhere? I want answers, and I want them _now._"

"Ah." Iruka's eyes dropped to the floor; Kakashi found it odd that he seemed not in the least bit worried about the gun currently pointed in his direction. "Well, you see, Kurenai-sa—"

"Yes, you're going to start with her—it—whatever," Kakashi interrupted. "You told her you would do it as soon as possible, so what're you going to do to me? And why have you been stalling?"

Iruka looked up, and the hurt pulsing in his brown eyes made Kakashi's heart twist in on itself—but he clamped down firmly on his emotions, keeping the gun steadily trained on his target. Iruka swallowed. "Kakashi—"

"If you were going to kill me," Kakashi said, "you could've just done it in my sleep."

"What—no!" Iruka looked horrified. "I would never—I mean…" His voice trailed off, and he sighed. "It has nothing to do with that," he said. "It's just…for a little while, I just…I wanted to be with you again, that's all."

Kakashi blinked. "What…do you mean by that?"

Iruka slowly shook his head. "You don't remember," he whispered. "You don't remember what you were…or what we had." He looked up, and Kakashi saw his eyes glistening with what looked suspiciously like tears. "You don't remember anything."

Kakashi frowned. "You know something about this?" he asked.

Iruka nodded slowly. "Yes," he said. "What happened eight years ago…I know everything."

The hand holding the gun began to shake. "Then tell me," Kakashi ordered.

Iruka's eyes slid shut, and he was quiet for a long moment. Finally, though, he took a deep breath that seemed to relax him, and when he opened his eyes, they were calm and collected. Resigned.

"Do you want to know what I am?" he asked, voice soft, neutral.

Not trusting himself to speak, Kakashi only nodded.

Iruka sighed. "Shoot me then," he said.

"What?" Kakashi stared at him.

"Shoot me," Iruka repeated, stern, serious. "Kill me…if you can."

Kakashi blinked, at an utter loss for words. "I…" _He can't be serious. I can't kill him—it's…it's wrong. And…and it'll hurt. I'll hurt. Why do I feel this way?_ "What—"

And then Iruka moved, a sudden flick of his right hand. _Shikk!_ Instantly something invisible but freezing cold and hard wrapped itself around Kakashi's wrist, and on reflex his finger jerked on the trigger. The sound of the discharge deafened him for an instant, and Iruka staggered backward as the bullet hit him square in the chest, stumbling back several steps and colliding with the wall.

Kakashi stood there for a moment, too stunned to move, before something came to life in his brain and he rushed forward, cold fear sinking into his heart. "Oh shit—Iruka! Iruka, are you all r—"

"Don't touch me." He stopped, staring as Iruka slowly rose, straightening against the wall. "Just watch," he said. Kakashi could do nothing but that as he watched the bloody wound slowly begin to shrink, the dark red retracting steadily in on itself, fading and diminishing until it was completely gone.

Iruka took a deep breath, straightening his shirt. "You see?"

"You…" The gun dropped to the floor as Kakashi throat suddenly ran dry. "You're…not human."

Iruka smiled, a sad, bitter smile. "You're right, I'm not," he said. "At least, not in your sense of the word." He jerked his right hand back a little, and the cold _something_ that was attached to Kakashi's wrist jolted as well, pulling him forward closer to Iruka.

The teacher slowly offered his other hand. "Please, if you would," he said.

Kakashi stared at him for a good long moment before finally looking down at the hand and then back up at Iruka's face. Iruka sighed. "Just…trust me, okay? Please."

And Kakashi, against all his better instincts, took the hand.

It was like being flung into a tank of freezing cold water, and he was suddenly spiraling down, down, down into endless black and blue and cold, so cold and wet and he couldn't _breathe_—

And then it was gone as quickly as it had come. Kakashi straightened, trying to steady his breathing, and suddenly noticed that he was hanging on to Iruka's hand as if for dear life. Embarrassed, he withdrew his hand, taking a step back—and nearly fell off the top of the bridge.

"Oh _fuck—_" He quickly shuffled forward, steadying himself as he turned to stare at the dark waters below, the boats traversing them mere pinpoints from his view. "What the hell'd you bring me here for?" he yelled, turning to glare at Iruka.

Iruka was currently distracted, staring passively down at his palm and Kakashi, following his gaze, was surprised to see that the skin was badly burned, seared a dark red. The wound was rapidly closing though, and when the skin had sealed itself over and was whole once again, Iruka straightened, looking up and smiling softly. "It's nothing, don't worry about me," he said. "And now back to the business at hand." He swept an arm around, indicating the bridge and the waters below. "This is where your test will be."

Kakashi blinked. "T-Test?"

Iruka nodded. "I'll explain it to you fully in a bit," he said, "But first I have to ask you again: do you believe in Angels, Kakashi?"

Kakashi bit his lip. "I already told you no."

Iruka cocked his head. "Not even after seeing Kurenai-sama this morning at the altar?"

"Could've been a—a hologram or a trick of the light or something."

"Ah." Iruka sighed, turning away from Kakashi and instead looking out at the distant lights of the city as he spoke. "So you wouldn't believe me if I told you that you're actually an Angel?"

Kakashi's first reaction was natural. "You have got to be kidding."

"No," Iruka said, turning. "I'm not allowed to kid in this business. It would displease my…ah, boss."

Kakashi gave him a skeptical look. "And who exactly is this boss of yours?"

In answer, Iruka lifted one finger and pointed it toward the sky above.

Kakashi shook his head. "This is—no. This is a joke of some sort, and it isn't funny, Iruka."

"It's no joke," Iruka said. "How else do you explain my healing ability? Or Kurenai-sama? Or how we got here? Or…this thing?" He made a looping motion with his right hand and the cold invisible hardness slowly slid off of Kakashi's wrist.

Kakashi shook his head vigorously. "I refuse to—"

"You want to shoot me again and see?" Iruka asked. "You can aim for my head this time. It'll be the same result." He paused. "You see, Kakashi, I can't die. And neither can you."

Kakashi opened his mouth to retort, but instead closed it again, thoughtful. Finally he spoke, though his voice was still skeptical. "All right, pretend for a moment that I actually believe you," he said. "What happened to me then? Why can't I remember anything?"

Iruka smiled sadly. "You lived on this earth two centuries ago," he said. "You were a good person, so when you died, you went to Heaven and became an Angel. You served the Father loyally for the next two hundred years.

"Then, eight years ago, you were sent to deliver someone to Heaven, someone who…wasn't exactly stable. You failed though, because that person ended up committing suicide. As punishment, you were banished to earth for eight years, one for each slash that person put on his wrist.

"As for your memories…an Angel's memories are attached to the feathers on his wings. Each feather is one memory, and when you fell, your wings were removed so you lost all recollection of who you were, except for your name and your age."

He paused then, wetting his lips slowly before continuing. "Now your eight-year sentence is up," he said, "And I have been sent to give you your wings back and help you ascend to Heaven again."

Kakashi spoke slowly. "And how exactly are you going to do that?"

"Oh, well, it's relatively simple," Iruka said. "All you have to do is step off this bridge, and trust in your wings to lift you up. If you have faith in the Father and in Heaven, you'll get your wings back and you'll be saved. If you don't believe, however, you'll fall to your permanent death and cease to exist at all." He paused. "It's a…leap of faith, if you will."

Kakashi turned, took one look over the bridge, and turned back. "You're crazy."

"No," Iruka said, "Just unfortunate."

"What does that mean?"

Iruka shook his head. "That doesn't matter," he said, before stepping up to the very edge of the bridge, looking passively down at the water below. "So are you going to do it?"

Kakashi spun. "Do I _look_ suicidal to you?" he snapped. "I'll be lucky if every bone in my body doesn't shatter when I hit the water!"

"You just have to trust in yourself," Iruka said, speaking softly. "Trust in yourself, and the Father, and Heaven, and…and me, Kakashi. Can't you at least trust in me?"

Very slowly Kakashi turned, walking up and joining Iruka at the edge of the bridge. When he spoke, his voice shook slightly. "That's not enough, is it? Just you…it's not enough."

Iruka sighed. "I can't force you to do this, Kakashi," he said. "It's your decision to make, after all. But know that you were one of the Angels most blessed and most loved by the Father, and he wants you back just as much as I do. He loves you too…just as much as I do."

Kakashi turned at these words, blinking in surprise at Iruka, but the other man was not looking at him; rather, his gaze was fixed on some distant spot on the dark horizon as he spoke again. "It's all about trust, Kakashi."

The young storekeeper turned back, wondering what Iruka was looking at, wondering if he saw some sort of light on the horizon that Kakashi had been blind to all along. When he spoke, his voice was soft, quiet. "A leap of faith, huh?" Glancing back down at the dark waters below, he swallowed hard.

Iruka nodded. "After that, even I don't know what will happen."

Kakashi sighed, staring down at the water, becoming lost in the darkness as he thought. Thought about the past eight years, and how he had always felt lost and alone, abandoned in a world in which he did not belong. Thought about his memories that he could not recall, but that he would do anything to retrieve. Thought about how, when Iruka had come into his life, he had felt, for the first time, complete. Alive. Loved.

When he spoke, the words were so soft that Iruka almost didn't catch them.

"Be seeing you then," Kakashi whispered, and stepped off the bridge.


	6. Finale

**A/N: **And so ends MoY. The lyrics used in this final chapter come from the song "Black Balloon" by Goo Goo Dolls. It is quite possibly my favorite song ever, and I thought it fit well with what was going on.

Mm. I don't really like the writing in this chapter; it came off as choppy and generally not very good. Forgive me?

Faiths are my own creation, and I do not claim to have gotten the idea for them from any religious source.

There were a couple of lines in the story that were lime-ish, but since I didn't want to raise the rating just for a measly couple of lines, I just took them out. If you _really_ want to read them, email me or something and I'll send you the full chapter.

A huge thanks to everyone who's supported me in my story. You guys really are the best.

Hopefully I'll have another KakaIru fic for you in the near future; most are still ideas and haven't been written yet. When they do finally make it onto paper, though, I'm sure I'll be seeing many of you again. Thanks!_-MeeLee_

**_MEMORIES OF YOU: _FINALE

* * *

**

_Comin' down, the world turned over._

_And angels fall without you there,_

_And I go on as you get colder,_

_Or are you someone's prayer?

* * *

_

The wind lashed out at him, tearing at his skin like so many frozen whips, and he could feel it howling in his ears as he fell toward the water, the water that was cold and dark and spoke of death. Then Kakashi felt the cold fear slam into him, the thought that he had been stupid to believe this, that he was going to _die_, that he was going to splatter into the water and float down the river in so many fucking _pieces_, that Iruka—

_Iruka._

He opened his mouth, and the choked, whispered words slowly made their way over his cracked lips, shaky, uncertain. "I—I trust…" He resisted the urge to scream, instead channeling the energy into his words. "I _trust_—I trust in the Father—"

The words melted into a desperate, jumbled prayer as the surface of the dark water came closer and closer, looming like the maw of some great and terrible beast. "I tr-trust in Heaven—I trust…I tr-trust—oh God, I trust—" The water loomed up before him, and he almost closed his eyes but then he saw something in the water. Something that slowly lightened before him, something that twisted and changed until it took the shape of a familiar face, a bright smile, reassuring brown eyes. And suddenly he found his strength.

"I trust in _Iruka—_"

Warmth and bright light burst all around him, and for half a second Kakashi thought he had died—and then they came back, all the memories—_white, sunlight, the smile of the Father, bright bright Heaven, happiness, songs, joy, wings, power, magic, peace_—and suddenly he remembered, remembered _everything_, and felt the familiar soothing warmth on his back as his wings unfolded. Beating them quickly, he managed to right himself a mere meter or so above the water, staring for a moment down at his reflection glowing in the dark ripples of the surface.

He was Hatake Kakashi, and he was an Angel. A blessed Angel, loved by the Father and all other Angels, who had served loyally in Heaven for two hundred years. An Angel. Blessed. He _remembered._

Then he looked up, and saw the small fishing boat that was floating only several meters away, and the three crewmen currently staring at him in disbelief. He raised his hand, palm outward and facing them, and thought, _Sleep_, and watched passively as all three humans slumped slowly onto the deck in a deep slumber.

He was an Angel. He remembered everything.

Then he looked back down into the water, and saw the smiling face once again moments before it shimmered and disappeared into the darkness. He frowned slightly. Yes, he remembered so much now…but why couldn't he remember anything about Iruka?

Flapping his wings powerfully, he shot upward into the sky, gliding down on a passing current and landing smoothly on top of the bridge once again. Iruka turned upon his arrival and smiled, though it was a sad smile. "I'm glad you are yourself again…Kakashi-sama."

And Kakashi took one look at him, and suddenly knew. Beating his wings once, he sent a rush of air toward Iruka so that it washed over him, easily dispelling the illusion, revealing the fact that he was dressed in simple, sleeveless dark gray robes, his hair loose and spilling onto his shoulders, a single glinting silver chain attached to a shackle around each wrist. The chains melted into the air halfway across the bridge, but Kakashi knew where they extended: all the way into Heaven, attached to the throne of the Father himself. Prone to being cut at his—or any displeased Angel's—discretion.

Kakashi spoke, his voice calm. "You're a Faith," he said.

Iruka sighed softly, though it might have just been Kakashi's imagination. Very slowly, he sank into a respectful kneeling position. "You are correct."

Kakashi frowned. It was uncommon for Faiths to be sent to deliver people to Heaven, much less save fallen Angels. Faiths were only semi-holy creatures, after all; they had hardly any magic, and were no match for Angels in either power or knowledge. They were human souls who were too pure for Hell yet had sinned too much for Heaven, and lived as humble servants of the Angels, eternally chained. They were tainted because of their sins so that they burned at the touch of an Angel, and were prone to being banished to Hell for eternity if any mistake was made. Therefore, they stayed mostly in Heaven, quietly serving the Angels' every need, always subservient, passive, eternally patient.

In short, Iruka was not supposed to be here.

Kakashi cocked his head. "Why were you sent to deliver me?" he asked.

"I volunteered," Iruka said. "It's a…redemption of sorts."

Kakashi blinked. "Are you expecting to be blessed for this?" Faiths could, after all, receive Angelic blessings just like regular human souls, which would in turn make them into Angels and allow them to enter Heaven fully. However, most Angels did not use their blessings on Faiths, preferring to reserve them for purer human souls. After all, an Angel only had one blessing to give, and it would be unwise to waste it on a Faith who was already tainted with sin.

Iruka smiled, soft, bitter. "No," he said. "As I said, it is just a redemption. My own peace of mind, if you will."

Kakashi was silent for a long moment, watching him. He had seen Iruka somewhere before; he knew it, could feel it in his very being, but he couldn't quite place his finger on it. Had Iruka served him at some point? Had they somehow run into each other in Heaven sometime?

_You don't remember what you were…or what we had._

_He loves you…just as I do._

Was it possible?

* * *

_You know the lies they always told you_

_And the love you never knew._

_What's the things they never showed you_

_That swallowed the light from the sun_

_Inside your room?

* * *

_

Very slowly, Kakashi looked up. "Iruka, how did you become a Faith?"

When the Faith replied, his voice was slightly less certain, but Kakashi knew he wouldn't lie. A Faith could not lie to an Angel. "Suicide," he said.

"When?"

A pause. "Eight years ago."

Silence hung between them for what seemed like centuries. Finally, though, Kakashi spoke. "You have my last feather," he said. It was not a question; it was a statement. "I want it back."

Iruka shifted uncomfortably, refusing to look Kakashi in the eyes. "You're…better off without it. Trust me, please, Kakashi-sama."

Kakashi slowly shook his head. "Give it to me, Iruka," he ordered.

Iruka could not refuse; they both knew that. And so, with a sort of small, uncertain sigh, the Faith lifted a hand, opening his palm and concentrating. Before long, a single long white feather materialized in his palm, floating lightly in the air just above his hand, pulsing pure white.

Kakashi raised a hand, beckoning, and the feather lifted easily off from Iruka's hand, twisting and turning lazily on the breeze as it floated slowly over to Kakashi, waltzing merrily with the wind before it finally settled near the base of his right wing.

The memories hit him like a wave.

_He is lost, Kakashi. You must deliver him to us._

_Yes, Father._

_FLASH._

_"Hi, are you…Umino Iruka-san? I'm Kakashi. You look like you could use a little cheering up. Want to go grab some coffee?"_

_FLASH._

_"Do you believe in Angels, Iruka? Or Heaven and Hell?"_

_FLASH._

_"You have to stop this, Iruka. Killing yourself won't solve anything."_

_FLASH._

_"I'm an Angel, Iruka. I've been sent to save your soul. I think you at least deserve to know that much."_

_FLASH._

_"Iruka! Iruka, no—_stop!_" Panic, cold, frantic breathing, fear—_

_"Why—Why c-can't you just let me go?"_

_"…Because I've fallen in love with you."_

_FLASH._

_Gentle, his lips are so gentle. Like kissing a passing spring breeze. "Oh, Iruka, I love you so much—"_

_FLASH._

_Tears._

_"You can't leave me."_

_"I'm sorry, Iruka. Please be strong."_

_"Kakashi!"_

_FLASH._

_Bathroom tiles, smooth and white and now blood-red. The small figure sprawled on the tile like a limp doll. Blood—blood, blood, blood._

_Frantic, harsh fear, can't breathe, NO— "Iruka! _IRUKA!_"_

_FLASH._

_You have failed, Kakashi._

_I know, Father._

_You must be punished for this._

_Yes, Father._

_And all goes to black._

Kakashi slowly lifted his head, opening his eyes and allowing the memories to fade like leaves swept away in the wind. Iruka was not looking at him; instead, the Faith once again had his eyes fixed on some distant point on the horizon. Kakashi now knew what he was looking for.

He had been seeking escape—salvation—his whole life. And he had found it with Kakashi. But then…but then everything went wrong after that.

* * *

_Comin' down, the world turned over._

_And angels fall without you there,_

_And I go on as you get colder,_

_Or are you someone's prayer?_

_And there's no time left for losin'—_

_When you stand, they fall…

* * *

_

When the Angel spoke, his voice was soft, neutral. "I fell from Heaven because of you."

Iruka swallowed hard, finding it hard to speak through the lump in his throat. "I'm sorry," he whispered, not trusting himself to look at Kakashi as he said it. "I…I was hoping to make up for it by sending you back."

"I loved you." Equally quiet.

"I know." Equally guilty.

A long pause. A cold wind blew, ruffling Kakashi's pure white robes and Iruka's dark gray ones. The Angel stepped forward then, and extended a hand. "Approach," he said.

Iruka looked up, confused, but Kakashi repeated the command and so he rose, carefully walking closer to the Angel. Kakashi reached out toward him, but Iruka instantly shied away, not wanting to be burned. Kakashi shook his head. "Stay still," he commanded, and the Faith had to obey as he came closer, slowly reaching down and wrapping his fingers firmly around Iruka's wrist, just above the shackle.

The Faith winced, but said nothing, made no complaint, only closed his eyes and turned away. When Kakashi spoke, his voice was low, calm. "I should've done this a long time ago," he said, and jerked forward on Iruka's arm, pulling the Faith forward and wrapping him in a tight embrace.

The resulting pain was unbearable; every inch of his skin that came into contact with Kakashi felt like it had been set on fire, melting right off of his bones. Iruka screamed, the agony burning through his nerves, and a suspicious charred smell began seeping into the air as he pushed desperately against Kakashi, struggling to escape, but the Angel refused to let go. Instead, Kakashi encircled him more firmly in his arms, wrapping them both in the white cocoon of his wings and concentrating. That only made the pain worse and another agonized cry tore itself from Iruka's throat; his cheek brushed against Kakashi's shoulder and was instantly seared red, and when Kakashi gently kissed his forehead it felt like being branded.

Then the pain spread, welling up in his back and he shrieked, the sound muffled by Kakashi's shoulder as he began to thrash—his back felt like it was melting; skin, bone, flesh, everything felt like it was falling apart back there, and he could barely feel through the intense pain the blood seeping into his robes. Kakashi's hands swept over his back and Iruka jerked, the tears streaming down his face. "Cr-Cruel…"

"No," Kakashi whispered, gently caressing the Faith's bleeding back, pressing repeated kisses to his forehead, his hair, everywhere he could reach. "No, please, just hold on a little longer—"

"St-Stop," Iruka pleaded. "Please—I'm sorry, just p-please…" And then his entire body gave a slow, thorough shudder before finally, mercifully relaxing as he was driven into unconsciousness.

Kakashi held him for a minute longer, gently running his fingers over Iruka's back, biting his lip as they grew red with the Faith's blood. Iruka's body continued giving involuntary jerks under his hands, natural responses to the pain even though the Faith was currently unconscious, and Kakashi felt the tears spring to his own eyes as he silently prayed that it would be over soon.

And then suddenly he felt it: a surge of heat that welled up inside himself and then receded just as rapidly, seeping into Iruka. The Faith's body convulsed one final time before going still at last, and two eerie _clinks_ rang out in the night as both shackles on Iruka's wrists suddenly snapped open, falling limply to the ground. Kakashi watched quietly, relieved, as the blood covering Iruka's back slowly began to fade, receding into itself, until the robes were new and fine once again.

He gently lowered Iruka down then, setting his head gently in his lap; he smiled when Iruka's body gave no pain response, and noted that the skin had already fully healed. Reaching down, he tenderly caressed Iruka's face, waiting patiently.

Soon enough, Iruka began to respond; his eyelids fluttered and he gradually turned toward the touch, dispelling a breath that tickled Kakashi's fingers, and Kakashi simply watched as ever so slowly those two soft brown eyes fluttered open, blinking for a moment in confusion up at the dark night sky before settling on him.

Instantly they widened in fear and Iruka sprang up, shuffling back several steps as far away from him as he could get, terror written clearly on his face. Kakashi did nothing to stop him, having expected as much, and instead rose slowly to his feet, extending a hand. "Don't be afraid," he said.

"No." Iruka shook his head, taking another step back as Kakashi stepped forward. "Please—I said I was sorry—please, no more…"

"Don't move," Kakashi said.

But Iruka did not obey, did not even seem to hear him as he continued stepping backward, closer and closer to the edge of the bridge. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he repeated, almost like a mantra, eyes casting about for some form of escape.

"Iruka." Kakashi gave him his best reassuring smile. "Please, just trust me." And he reached forward.

Iruka's reaction was instant; he leaped back—but he was already dangerously close to the edge of the bridge, and his foot caught on the metal ledge. He gave a surprised cry as the foundation gave beneath him, and for a brief instant his stomach lurched and intense cold rushed through his body as he began to fall—but then Kakashi was there, seizing his wrist firmly and pulling him back up and into his arms.

Instantly Iruka winced and shut his eyes tightly, expecting more pain, but was surprised when he felt none. He heard Kakashi chuckle right beside his ear.

"Surprised?" the Angel asked, gently disengaging him and reaching up to brush a finger against his cheek. Iruka flinched, but again felt nothing, and he blinked up at Kakashi in complete confusion.

"What…" His voice trailed off when he noticed for the first time that the wrist Kakashi was currently grasping was bare, as was the other. "Where—Where are my chains?"

At this, Kakashi smiled, bringing Iruka's hands up and covering them with his own. "You can't chain an Angel, Iruka," he said.

* * *

_Comin' down, the world turned over._

_And angels fall without you there,_

_And I go on as you get colder,_

_All because I'm—_

_Comin' down, the years turn over._

_And angels fall without you there,_

_And I go on, I will lead you home and_

_All because I'm…_

_All because I'm…_

_I'll become_

_What you became to me…

* * *

_

The situation finally hit Iruka like a slap across the face and for a moment he could only stare blankly at Kakashi, disbelieving. Kakashi smiled again. "I gave you my blessing, Iruka," he said. "You're not a Faith anymore; you're an Angel now."

Suddenly Iruka was finding it very hard to speak. "K-Kakashi—"

"Spread your wings," Kakashi said. "You're free now." And reaching around Iruka, he gently passed his hands over Iruka's back. Instantly something like a pleasant warmth spread there—it was like sitting with his back to a fire—and suddenly he felt a new weight, tangible but infinitely light, and peering back he was astonished to see a pair of large white wings jutting out of his back.

"I think we should get you out of these things too," Kakashi said, and made a motion in the direction of Iruka's clothing. Instantly the dark gray robes lengthened, spreading over his arms, and lightened in color until they were white, pure cream white like Kakashi's, glowing softly in the dark. Kakashi's smile broadened. "Now, don't you think you look a lot nicer in those?"

Iruka swallowed hard, biting his lip. "Kakashi," he whispered. "Kakashi, why did you do this?" When the Angel gave him a blank look, he continued, speaking fast. "You only have one blessing to give—you're not supposed to waste it on me! It's your job to bless a good human soul, not some suicidal maniac like me—and besides, I'm the reason you got banished to earth in the first place, so why—"

He was cut off when Kakashi reached forward, pulling him into a tight embrace, burying his face in Iruka's shoulder. Iruka made something akin to a squeak at the sudden movement, arms coming up to instinctively return the embrace as Kakashi spoke, voice smooth and silky next to Iruka's ear. "You already know the reason," the Angel whispered.

"Kakashi." Iruka swallowed, gently pulling back from the embrace and looking straight into Kakashi's eyes. "That was eight years ago. You only experienced a memory; it doesn't mean—"

"Yes, it does," Kakashi said, cutting him off. "Because eight years can't erase what we had, Iruka. You know this, because you feel it too."

Iruka bit his lip. "I—I can't," he said. "Because it doesn't matter what I—"

"Oh, but it does," Kakashi said. "You're an Angel now, remember? We're equals, and as such, we can talk as equals, and live as equals…and love as equals. Isn't that what you want?"

When Iruka didn't answer, he edged closer, gently placing his forehead against Iruka's. "All these years," he said, "I may have forgotten so many things, but I don't think I ever forgot you. Even when I first saw you in my bookstore, I felt something. It was an echo, perhaps, but it was there. And it's there now, and I'm not about to let it go." He paused, and when he spoke again, his voice held a hint of worry, of desperation. "There isn't just a lifetime before us, Iruka. It's an eternity, and I want to spend it with you…so please, tell me it's not over. Please, Iruka."

Iruka looked up at him for a long time, and Kakashi saw the uncertainty in his brown eyes, gradually escalating into confusion and bewilderment before finally fading into the calm of acceptance. And then he smiled, a soft, genuine smile that made Kakashi fall in love with him all over again.

Very slowly, he reached up and gently touched Kakashi's face. "Kiss me, Kakashi," he whispered. "And it'll be forever after that."

He had barely finished speaking before Kakashi's lips were on his, gentle and soft yet barely concealing the desire underneath, and Iruka felt the other Angel's arms wrap around him and allowed himself to be pulled against Kakashi in a firm embrace, sliding his own hands into Kakashi's silver hair as he deepened the kiss.

They pulled apart after what seemed like an eternity, both of them flushed and slightly out of breath. After a moment, though, Kakashi turned, making a casual waving motion with his hand, and slowly a long lighted tunnel opened before them, glowing beautifully in the night and beckoning them to Paradise.

The silver-haired Angel smiled, gently taking Iruka's hand. "Shall we?" he said, and together they ascended into the light.

**FINI**


End file.
